Building Bridges

How to Turn a Conversation to Spiritual Things

Moving a conversation around to spiritual things can be the most difficult part of witnessing. We can talk freely with our friends about many subjects, but are at a loss when we want to bridge the gap between everyday life and the Lord. What does driving to work every morning or playing golf or washing the dishes or changing the baby have to do with our spiritual lives? How can we take an everyday situation and make a comment based on that situation that will cause our friends to ask us what we meant? How can we ask them a question (again, based on an everyday situation) that will cause their thoughts to leap into the realm of spiritual things?

            Let me emphasize at this point that the ability to turn a conversation around to spiritual things is not a “gift.”  It can’t be found in any of the gift passages in the Bible (I Cor. 12 and so one). But it can be learned! The only requirement is that you be concerned enough about the salvation of your unsaved friend to practice thinking through your own everyday situations and plan ahead what you would like to say in each situation.

            The following conversation steps will guide you through the process from talking about the weather to discussing the gospel. This process is universal. It doesn’t depend on your personality. Anyone can carry on a conversation with another person using these four steps, if he or she practices the steps ahead of time. In fact, in some situations you will be able to go from step one to step four in just a few minutes. With long-term friends, work colleagues, or relatives it may take you longer to get to step four, but if you practice the method beforehand, bathe it in prayer, and carry it in fear and trembling, the Lord might surprise you and allow you to get to step four with the most hardened antagonist!

            Please, dear reader, learn and practice these four steps well.

The Overview

1.         Surface Talk – Is the person alive?

Talk about the weather, sports, and so on.

2.         Personal Talk – Will the person open up?

Talk about family, jobs, or interests.

3.         Religious Talk – Is there interest in spiritual things?

Talk about religion, churches, or church activities.

If the friend is not interested at this time, retreat to step two!

4.         Spiritual Talk – Is the person seeking God?

Talk about what Christ has done for you; ask his or her view of Christianity. Then invite him or her to a Bible study or give the gospel. If the friend is not seeking at this time, retreat to step three!

            Reality Check – Read Colossians 4:2-6.

1. Surface Talk with our acquaintances opens the door to conversation. We do this all the time, often without knowing it.

2. Personal Talk is the step of discovery. We want to know as much about our acquaintances as possible before moving on to more serious topics. We want our friends to open up about themselves.

3. Religious Talk moves the conversation in the direction of the gospel. We are not going to give the gospel at this point. We have to find out if they are interested in spiritual things. Even our relatives, whom we think we know so well, maybe seeking the Lord but may never have anyone to talk to about it. This step is very important. Don’t hurry on to step four, yet.

            4. Spiritual Talk will discover if our friends are seeking God or just dabbling in religious ideas. There are lots of moral people who don’t want God to mess us their lives. Is the person truly seeking God, or is he happy to be just a religious person? At this point you have to decide what you want to offer your friend: the whole gospel or a Bible study. When the Lord first met people, He spent more time making them thirsty for Him than He did telling them how to get into heaven.

            Let’s look at these four steps in some detail.

1. Surface Talk

Have you ever stood next to a person in a shop for a few seconds and neither of you spoke? After a few more seconds, you both became uncomfortable. The reasons for this would need another book to explain why, but the fact remains, you will react in one of two ways. You will either step away from that person, putting more distance between you, or you will make some comment on a variety of neutral subjects. Perhaps you will mention the weather (if we had no weather, most of us wouldn’t have anything to talk about!), the slow service in the shop, the horrible rush – hour traffic, and so on.

In most cases, we talk about such things because we can’t handle long periods of silence with strangers or acquaintances. This level of conversation is the perfect starting place for an evangelistic conversation. The only goal at this point is to mention something more personal about yourself than the weather: family, school, work, neighbors, pets, or anything that opens your life up just a little to this acquaintance. Just mention it, don't give your life story! Then, casually ask the acquaintance about that same area of his or her life. For example, after you mentioned the weather, say,

“Yes, I’ve lived here for [it doesn’t matter how long], and I think that the weather is [it doesn’t matter what you think about the weather]. Have you lived here long?”

Telling the person something about yourself gives you the unspoken right to ask that person the same thing. There are infinite possibilities for moving from surface talk to personal talk, as long as you remember your goal. You want people to open up about themselves. You’re not interested in talking about yourself! You want to find out as much as possible about them. In order to do this effectively, you'll have to listen to them more than you talk about yourself. As they open up a little bit, tell them a little bit more about yourself, and then ask them more about themselves. Most people love to talk about themselves. If you practice listening to people, you will make enormous progress in your evangelistic efforts.

2. Personal Talk

This level of conversation is easy. You will never run out of things to talk about. You can ask questions about a person’s birthplace, hometown, family, education, work, vacations, retirement, interests and hobbies, music, artistic abilities, politics, cooking, history, and sports of all kinds. One very good subject to talk about is weekends and the free time. Ours has become an entertainment society.

            Once a subject has been mentioned, ask a question about it. Use the five W’s: Who? What? Where? When? Why? If possible, attempt to establish some common interests with the person. Just remember, you don’t have to be an expert in the field to ask someone’s opinion about that subject. You just have to be a good listener. And if you don't like what the person likes, show an interest in it anyway! You are not trying to change his or her priorities or hobbies. You are trying to bring the person to the Lord. Ask about his or her favorite sport, even if you don’t know that a basketball is round and larger than a baseball.

            One very important point is to find out the person’s first name and use it off and on in the conversation. A person’s first name is one of the most important words in his or her vocabulary. Be genuinely interested in that person.

            Throughout this level of conversation, watch the person's body language: eyebrows going up and down, eyes looking away from you, smiling or frowning, nervous tapping of the feet or fingers, harsh or smooth voice tone, high or low voice pitch. You want to discover if the person is comfortable with the direction of the conversation. If the person seems to be closing up, don’t feel guilty! Relax. Enjoy the practice and go find another acquaintance to talk to. If the person becomes vulgar in his vocabulary, ask yourself if this is his normal way of expressing himself or if he is trying to offend you. If this is how he normally talks, don’t take offense and don’t correct him. Keep listening and keep the conversation going. If he is trying to offend you (which is very rare at this level of conversation), start using “God talk” immediately, such as “The Bible says . . .”; “Jesus always . . .”; or “God wants us to . . .” and so on. This will usually cause him to leave.

            This level of conversation is very easy to learn, especially if you will carry out a little experiment with yourself. For the next week, spend thirty minutes a day starting conversations with strangers or acquaintances about surface topics and moving on to personal items. Then ask questions about their interests and do not talk about yourself. Try it! You will eventually see common interests develop.

3. Religious Talk

The first levels of conversations are pre-evangelism. They’re all about building rapport. Now we are going to take the plunge. But first, let’s destroy a long assumption on our part. Most believers assume that a stranger or acquaintance does not want to talk about spiritual things. This is categorically wrong. Even atheists like talking about their views of God! They may be irrational, but they love a listening ear. Although most people may not respond positively toward the Gospel, they do appreciate having someone ask them about themselves and listening to their ideas or their problems in this life. A listening ear may be the very thing that causes a person to seek God.

If you do get to the level of religious talk, and the person seems cool or antagonistic, retreat! Back down to the personal talk level. We are not called to push the gospel anyone. When the apostle Paul witnessed in Acts, he "reasoned" the people (Acts 17:17); he didn't force-feed them. If a person does not want to discuss religious things, then you can’t reason with that person. Go back to talking about things at the second level and keep the conversation friendly.

When you transition from surface talk to personal talk, you make a statement about yourself and then you ask the other person a question about that same area of his or her life. The transition process is the same between personal talk and religious talk. For example, when talking about how you spend your weekends, say,

“Well, on weekends we usually [it doesn’t matter what you do] on Saturday, and then we [eat out in a restaurant, have friends over for lunch, whatever] after church. “

Wait a few seconds to watch for body language, then continue with,

“Do you attend church?”

Regardless of the answer, say,

“I see. Have you ever read the Bible? “

Regardless of the answer, say,

“You know, I’m always interested in other people’s viewpoints on what’s in the Bible. Would you have time for us to get together just one time to read a passage together? I would really appreciate listening to what you think about it.”

Emphasize the “just one time” so the person can see that you are not trying to drag or seduce him or her into a lifetime cult. Here’s another example:

“I really enjoy reading, especially books that make me think. What do you like to read?”

His or her answer.

“Do you ever read any philosophy or religious books?”

His or her answer.

“"You know, I'm always interested in other people's viewpoints on what's in the Bible. Would you have time for us to get together just one time to read a passage together? I would really appreciate listening to what you think about it.”

See how easy that is? And if you practice having these conversations with imaginary people, it will really start to come naturally. Remember your goal: getting your acquaintance to read the Bible with you just one time.

Here are some topics and bridges that can lead into religious talk.

•       As a new person in town if he has found everything he needs, like the post office, courthouse, church, schools. Offer to help if you need it.

•       Ask a person in which church she was married and what kind of church it is. If the conversation continues in this direction, ask what her church believes about something, such as prayer, working on Sunday, how to get to heaven, the person of Jesus. If the opportunity arises, ask why her church believes what it believes. Ask her if she believes the same as her church. If you start to share your beliefs, don’t preach! You might even invite her to read the Bible with you one time to compare viewpoints on it.

•       Talk about the Arab–Israeli conflict and how it all started.

•       Decry the decline of morals and ask if evil people will ever be punished for their deeds. (Will God judge people Sunday?)

•       Comment on the tabloids at the checkout counter.

•       Use religious holidays as springboards about the real reason for the season.

•       Use God–related phrases: Thank God. God bless you.

•       Use different names for God: God, the Lord, the good Lord; than later, Jesus Christ, Jesus.

•       Share your own personal spiritual truth about life without preaching a sermon.

•       If the other person mentions God, use his or her words as a bridge.

What do we doing our acquaintance responds with silence?

Smile and back down to the previous level of conversation. People are still noticing your witness! Don't feel guilty and don’t press harder. Don't become discouraged and quit witnessing altogether. Leave the results to God. Many people may not want to talk about religious topics. Don’t fret. Just accept it and keep looking for seekers.

What do we do when the person becomes aggressive? Stay friendly and breakoff the conversation as politely as possible. People respond negatively for a number of reasons. They might have had a bad experience with someone pushing religious views on them, and they now associate any conversation about spiritual things with that bad experience. You can easily help them overcome this by remaining friendly and not pushing the conversation any further. You might even mention that it really bothers you when people try to push their beliefs on you! This will usually disarm them and you might be able to resume the conversation a less tense level.

Another reason people might respond negatively is because they are under conviction and intuitively know that the conversation will show them their sin, even though you never mentioned sin or their lifestyle. The Holy Spirit works inside human beings in ways we cannot understand or predict.

If you are a friendly person and are trying to back down to the previous level of conversation, a person will rarely turn seriously aggressive. But if you are verbally attacked with vulgar language, then you may experience the joy of being persecuted for your faith. Rejoice and thank the Lord for allowing you to share in His sufferings. Your witness is making an impact. “Now, Lord, look on their threats, and grant to your servants that with all boldness they may speak Your Word” (Acts 4:29).

4. Spiritual Talk

If you have been constantly building bridges from one subject to another, you’ll start to notice if the person wants to proceed with the conversation. You want to ask yourself, “Does this person's actions and attitudes indicate that he or she wants to talk about spiritual things?” If you sense an openness after the religious talk, you can move the to spiritual talk by going in a number of directions.

You can invite him or her to visit your church. However, this might be too threatening at first.

You can ask the person two questions:

1. “If you were to die today, could you say for certain that you will go to heaven?”

2. “Why should God let you into his heaven?” This question let you know what the person is trusting him.

You can share the whole gospel with him or her. If you choose this route, keep the message as simple as possible, use illustrations for each point and, if the person is open to it, repeat the main points of the Gospel a number of times from different angles.

You can ask the person to read the Bible with you one time to see what God has to say about the things that you’ve been talking about. If this approach seems a little frightening to you at the moment, then you might invite the person to an evangelistic Bible study that is being led by someone else. This approach could give you the experience you desire to lead your own study in the near future.

The previous ideas should give you plenty of comments and questions to use in your own daily circumstances as you attempt to turn a conversation toward the spiritual realm. You simply have to practice thinking through the four levels of conversation ahead of time. The key is to remember your immediate goal. You do not want to give them the whole Gospel all at once but rather you want to make them curious about your beliefs. Following are some ideas you can use to accomplish this.

Categories for Questions

Reading

Letting people see you reading your Bible is a natural way to make them curious enough to ask you what you’re reading.

Take your pocket New Testament everywhere with you. Pull it out and read a couple of verses when you know that people are watching you. You don’t have to pull it out, read a verse, drop the Bible on the floor, and announce loudly, “Oh dear, I dropped my Bible!” Read a couple of verses at different times throughout the day: at coffee break or lunch, in the lecture hall, on the bus or on the train (not while driving, which will elicit a different reaction than the one you want!). Once you have answered a curious observer with the two words the Bible, the door is open for you to ask, “Have you ever read it?” No matter what answer he or she gives, you can reply, “I’ve found the Bible to be very interesting and helpful.” With a few more comments, you can easily ask, “Would you like to read the Bible with me?”

Reading has proved to be one of the best springboards available to us.  It does not matter what people read. If they like to read, you can talk about your or their reading interests.

For example, after becoming friends with a student in a class I was taking, we discovered that we both loved to read. After comparing books we had read and books we would like to read, I asked him if he liked to read a book with someone and then discuss it (or argue about it!). He said yes, and so I asked him if he had ever read and discussed or argued about the Bible, and would he like to do so with me? He said that he preferred to choose a different book, so I asked if we could read two books by switching off every other week. He agreed and chose a philosophy book that nearly did me in! The outcome was that I learned a lot of philosophy – and I often complained to my wife about its uselessness – but my friend eventually received the Lord! My friend and I still laugh today about his choice and how thankful he was that I agreed. In the beginning he did not understand the Bible, and I did not understand the philosophy book. He came to an excellent understanding of God’s Word, and I did not come to an excellent understanding of philosophy, but I learned how he thought.  He will be with me in eternity.

Employment

Ask your friends the following questions or make the following statements: “Is work an end in itself? Is there more meaning to my work than just receiving a paycheck? Some people eat to live, while others live to eat. Does this apply in any work to our work? Have you ever wondered what God has to say about work? Do you think that God made work as punishment for man’s sin? (No, He didn’t! Adam was given work in the garden before he sinned. The fruit of his work became harder to obtain after the fall.) The Bible has some very interesting things to say about the one extreme of laziness versus the other extreme of working too much. Would you like to read the Bible with me to discover God’s view of employment? God even says some unique things about employers. Have you ever wondered how our employment or the work we do here on earth will affect eternity?”

Hobbies and Sports

When you are watching a game (live or on TV) with your friend or playing tennis or hiking or exchanging stamps for your collections or stomping on each other’s gardens while chasing down that rare butterfly, you can always build a bridge with the statement: “I really need a day off (a day of rest, a hobby, a sport). It takes my mind off my weekly routine.” Then follow up with some of the following questions: “Do you think we need rest and relaxation? Why or why not? Maybe we should always work seven days a week. Do you believe that God made us to rest or to work?”

You might ask, “Do you ever wonder where we get our different interests? Why do some people like flying kites and others weaving baskets? Is each person unique? Why or why not?”

Or: “Why do some people run from one hobby (or job) to another, never seeming to be satisfied with life? What do you think makes a person satisfied with life?” If you can get your friend to ask you if you are satisfied with life, tell him that you find satisfaction reading what God says about man in the Bible. This theme can go in a number of profitable directions. Think through the topic ahead of time with your friend in mind (i.e., his job, his hobbies, and his satisfaction or dissatisfaction with life) and plan your questions accordingly.

Or: “Why do some people practice a sport or a hobby with a vengeance? Why do they always seem as though they have to win? Why are some people extremely competitive and others not? What is it about people that makes him want to rule over other others, even at the lower levels of society? Could you ever imagine a world without any competition?” If you are really bold, you might add:  “I can imagine such a world, because the Bible talks about one, one that God is going to bring to earth in the not-so-distant future.”  Remember, you only want to make your friend curious enough to read the Bible with you. You do not want to explain the book of Revelation to him on the front porch in twenty minutes.

History

Discussion of war and the total lack of security in this world can lead to a conversation about false hope. Many Europeans asked me what I thought about the Gulf War in early 1991, and I replied, “When it’s over, there will be another one somewhere else. In fact, someday there will be another one in Europe, and eventually another world war.” Needless to say, they asked me how I could know that! I replied, “It’s easy. First, history and human nature are clear indicators. I believe it was Goethe who once said, ‘Mankind has made lots of progress, but the human being has always remained the same. The only hope for the human being is to change him on the inside.’ However, almost 2000 years ago, the Bible predicted all of these things, and the Bible hasn’t been wrong yet.” The next obvious thing to do was to ask these friends if they have ever read the Bible and if they would like to do so with me.

False hope is another line of discussion. People have said to me, “I hope there’s not another war in Europe.” I ask them what grounds they see for having this hope, and this leads us back to what the Bible says. Think up a number of different examples of false hope in your own realm of experience and bring the conversation around to the Bible.

Science

This subject can be approached from either the viewpoint of the scientist or the layman.  In either case, our unsaved friends have to be shown the fallacy of believing every scientific theory that comes along (they will be replaced by newer ones in the near future) or thinking that scientists are gods and never make mistakes, even though many of their “conclusions” are based on extremely flimsy evidence. No true scientist will ever claim to have “arrived” (i.e., to have learned all there is to know about a subject) and, therefore, claim he can’t be wrong in his current conclusions. Quite often, science involves more politics than searching for truth. A college biology book I had to read for a class once even made that statement about some Nobel Prize winners.

Following are some thoughts to share with your unsaved friends to make them curious.

We are governed by physical laws that limit our freedom, and we do not violate these laws for our own good health. Does God have spiritual laws that we should obey for our health? You would never jump off the Golden Gate Bridge, hoping that you will go up instead of down.  The results of trying to break this law of physics would be uncomfortable. Are there any uncomfortable results from breaking God’s laws? How could we find an answer to this question? Will science be able to rescue the world from itself? Will more scientific progress draw humankind together? Why can’t the scientists tell us where matter came from originally and how dead matter became living matter?

You can use any area of science to springboard into spiritual things, including the following.

Biology. Where did life come from originally? What is the meaning of life or of beauty? Why do humans appreciate beauty and the animals don’t? A human seeks meaning in a Rembrandt painting, whereas a dog might chew it up. And don’t overlook the subject of cloning! If we can clone humans, where do these humans get their souls? Does God want us to clone humans? Is God forced to put a soul in each clone? What does the Bible say about everyone being made in God’s image? What does that mean?

Physics and Chemistry. What holds all matter together? How could such a complex system of atoms and subatomic particles be the result of sheer chance? Why are we just beginning to discover that classical mechanics is a special branch of quantum mechanics, instead of the reverse (humankind, as a life-form, being bound within very narrow limits)? How could we even hope to find God outside of our extremely limited life-support system unless God chose to come into our earthly system and reveal Himself in terms that we could understand?

The arts, humanities, social sciences, literature and languages lend themselves quite well to starting discussions about the meaning of life, who and what we are, why we have all of the problems that have always plagued us, and so on.

If you have the chance, you might read books written by an unsaved expert in some field that would give you some insight into how the unsaved mind thinks. Next, analyze this book critically by subjecting it to the biblical viewpoint. Then talk to your friends about how you enjoyed reading the book but disagreed with the author’s conclusions. Tell them how and why you disagree by referring to the Bible.

Politics

This subject can be dangerous. Remember: You are a Christian first and then a political person (Democrat, Republican, American, and so on). Winning your friend to Christ is eternally more important than getting him to change political parties.

Questions and thoughts to use include the following. “Do you think that politics will stop crime, wars, poverty, and so on? Why or why not? Why do many people become irate when discussing politics? Why do people sometimes have a hard time admitting they are wrong? Why do people champion a cause so religiously and then change their minds later? Do you think that people who put their faith in politics all of their lives will believe that it was worth it? Does a politician want to be accepted or rejected? Why?” Chapter seven of the Gospel of John gives us an interesting view of Jesus as He acts in an manner opposite to that of the average politician. He didn’t want to make himself known, and He told people the truth about themselves!

Money

Questions and ideas to use for discussion starters about this topic include the following. “What does the statement ‘The love of money is the root of all evil’ mean? Why do money and material possessions sometimes bring out the worst in a person? Why is money such a touchy subject for many? Do you know what the Bible says about money (Matthew 7 and James 5)? Does money keep people from coming to God? How? Should evangelists be rich or poor? Can a person be rich and still please God? (Yes, Abraham was rich!) What does God say should be the purpose of money?”

Sex

This subject for the braver ones must be approached with caution. The older generation will usually not appreciate the “openness” of a younger generation.  Keep in mind your goal: to make unsaved friends curious enough to want to read the Bible with you.

Ideas to be discussed with your unsaved friends include the following. “Is sex an end in itself? Is sex meant just for procreation? Is it a sin to enjoy sex within marriage? (Some religions believe this!) Should we have moral standards by which to live? Who should determine these standards? Why are there so many different moral standards in the world? Does God have a moral standard for us? What happens if we reject his standard? Is pleasure the ultimate in life? If you think it is, what if one person’s pleasure hurts another human being? Should we stop people from hurting themselves even though they claim to be enjoying themselves?”

If you are a believer and are engaged, your unsaved friends will be absolutely baffled that you are not sleeping with the person to whom you are engaged. You will have many opportunities to talk about how your faith leads to such a high morality. Be brave! You have the high ground. Your unsaved friends cannot contradict you, because they have never experienced such purity and self-control. And they can never again be virgins. Your purity is a very powerful testimony!

Academic Studies or School

This topic can be used with high school as well as college students. At these ages, most young people are open to thinking about the meaning and purpose of life. Challenge them to not throw their lives away on themselves but to give it to Jesus and let him make them into his image.

Ideas to start them thinking include the following. “Why should you go to school/college – to get a job and earn money and get married and have children who grow up and go to college to get a job while you get old and die? Where is the meaning in it all? Does the Bible have anything to say about learning? (Yes! Psalm 1; 119; Philippians 4:8; and many other Scripture references.) Are there some topics into which God forbids us to look? Why would God do that? Of the many trees in the Garden of Eden, why did God not want Adam and Eve to eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil? Why that specific tree? Where should human beings go to discover what is good and evil (right and wrong)? Should they seek these answers from their own experience (and maybe damage himself permanently, as did Adam and Eve), or should they go to God for advice?”

Housekeeping

Homemakers spend the vast majority of their time doing housework. There has to be a way to relate this responsibility to the spiritual realm. Try the following ideas with your neighboring housekeepers.

“Does life seem as meaningless as housework? A homemaker is always doing the same things over and over again, but the work is never done. How does the phrase go? ‘A woman’s work is never dumb, uh, done.’ The Bible has some very positive things to say about being faithful in tasks that seem never to be finished. A clean house can contribute to a happy family, but this happiness is only temporary. A fanatical house-cleaner may or may not have a happy family life. Similarly, one who is not so neat also may or may not have a happy family life.  From where does true happiness come? Can a person be truly happy doing the same work day after day? The Bible also speaks a lot about contentment apart from our circumstances. Would you like to read the Bible with me to discover these things?”

Weather

If we did not have the weather to talk about, then 90 percent of our time with other people would be spent in silence! Because we talk about the weather so much, it should be easy to think of transitions or bridges to spiritual topics.

For instance, consider the following examples. “The weather sure does change a lot. Sometimes I think that my opinions about life and God are as changeable and uncertain as the weather. Do you ever feel that way? Most people do not know that the Bible has some very interesting things to say about the weather, especially as the time gets closer for Jesus to return to this earth.”  (Make sure you know what the Bible has to say about the weather! Look up words in your concordance like wind, clouds, storm, and so on.) What – or who – ultimately determines the weather? Why can’t we control the weather? (Probably because some lunatic would use this power to try and take over the world!) Has any person ever been able to control the weather (Mk. 4:41)? What else could this person do?”

Health

Many Westerners are extremely health conscious, so you should have little trouble talking about this subject.  Following are some bridges.

“Why are so many people concerned with their health? We all die anyway. Why don’t people spend more time thinking about life after death? Won’t that life last a lot longer than this one? Which do you think should be more important, seventy years of good health on this earth or an eternity with God in heaven after this life? Is it a sin to over-eat? The Bible tells us that God disapproves strongly when we harm our bodies. At the same time, He tells us that if we make it into heaven to be with Him, He is going to give us new bodies. If our bodies are a gift from God, should we be more concerned about the gift or the Giver? Which would make the Giver happier?

Death

The subject of health can lead naturally into the topic of death. “Everyone dies. Is there no way out of this predicament? If not, are we concerned about life after death? The only reliable source on the subject of life after death would have to be someone who had actually died (not someone who suffered merely a short coma) and come back from the dead to tell us all about what ‘the other side’ was like. Has anyone done this? The foundation stone of true Christianity rests on the physical resurrection of Jesus. Do you think that there might be some truth to the Bible’s account of Jesus’ resurrection? Even if it sounds impossible, what if it were true? Would most people listen to Jesus? What if it were not true? How would that change Christianity today?

“A lot of people die young. How do you know if you will get old before you die? If you want to wait until the last minute to prepare for death, how do you know when that last minute will be? What if you are one minute late? Death comes to the young as well as to the old.”

This is not necessarily a topic to discuss when your friend is grieving for a loved one who has recently died. You must remain sensitive to your friend’s feelings. Make yourself available to listen and comfort your friend at the funeral or afterwards. The Lord may give you an opportunity to discuss what He has done on the cross and through His resurrection to overcome death.

Philosophy and Religion

Many people enjoy discussing religion, and once you are on the subject, it’s an easy step to ask your friends if they have read the Bible and if they would like to do so with you over coffee once a week. If you have the time, after reading the Bible, read some other viewpoints on life, such as the Koran, Buddhist and Eastern religions, philosophy, and so on. It would be helpful to read The Universe Next Door[1], or Christian Apologetics in a World Community.[2] These books will give you a good logical and biblical evaluation of many worldviews.

In my experience, religion, politics, money and sex have been the topics about which most people get upset. Keep in mind that some people may need to be upset to drag them out of their mental lethargy. In some situations, you may need to pray for bravery on your part. You’re not alone; the Apostle Paul asked for such prayers for himself (Eph. 6:19).

Remember: think through your possible conversations beforehand as much as possible. The possibilities are endless. You will gain confidence, and bridge-building will become easier the more you do it. This ability is not a gift, because it has been learned by different people with different personalities. It is simply a matter of practice. Eventually, you may even find yourself looking for different bridges; the old ones have become boring! When this happens, do not fail to recognize the joy you have begun to experience in your witnessing.

                  [1]James W. Sire, The Universe Next Door (Downers Grove, IL:  InterVarsity Press), 1988.

                  [2]William Dyrness, Christian Apologetics in a World Community (Downers Grove, IL:  Intervarsity Press), 1983.

Do It!

1.  Pick one topic of discussion about which you feel comfortable talking. Pick one person with whom you would like to talk, using this topic of conversation. Plan a time to get together with him or her, over coffee or tea, at lunch break, or during an evening. Make it as convenient as possible for your friend. Write out five questions you can ask during the conversation that will make your friend think about more than just the topic at hand.

2.  Look at your five questions and ask yourself, “What answers or objections will my friend give?” Write out responses to these answers and objections. Keep this thinking process going until your mind screams at you, “I’m tired!” Call your friend and make the appointment.

3.  Before your friend arrives, pray that the Lord will guide your thoughts and comments.

4.  ROLE PLAY.  This is one of the most effective ways of training yourself to witness! If you have a Christian friend who wants to witness to his friends, get together with him and role-play different witnessing situations. One of you can play the part of an unsaved person and come up with objections to reading the Bible, why the Bible is not to be trusted, why organized religions are bad, and so on (i.e., all of the objections your unsaved friends have made or might make Brainstorm!). The other person then can try to think up questions to ask in response to these objections. Stay away from giving answers. Questions are better for making your friends think.

DO THIS AS OFTEN AS YOU CAN.

SHOP

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